Ridiculous ramblings, really

I'm feeling: drained

I've driven over 1500km in the last 60 hours. I've seen over 2 hours of vids. I've met new and old people. I've listened to one CD on repeat for the last 10 hours.
I've had lots of fun - but no internet for two days.
My brain needs to settle before I can write a more coherent entry.

I'm feeling: content

First of all, thanks to everyone for the conga rats!

While I'm not finished with the diss by far, waiting for Prof. Blub to read it, is something completely different to not having written it yet. It feels good.

After my very frazzled entry, I had a very nice birthday. Boring, but nice. Long bath with silly book (reread Pope Joan, still not particularly good but enjoyable nonetheless), which I hadn't allowed myself until I finished either (books, not the baths) sleeping for a few hours in a freshly made bed, more reading, dinner with M. (no one else could make time to come, such are the joys of our place of work) - on our own our conversation tends to the awkward, live was easier in Kindergarten when it was still possible to say "I like you, can I be your friend?" without having to justify it - and did a clean install of Karmic Koala on Lachesis.

Today I avoided killing the Bitch Queen From Hell once again (barely), saw a Boa throw up 70cm of carpet and a dead rat and our head surgeon fix his trousers with Backhaus clamps.
I live a surreal live at the best of times.

Now to finish setting up the computer with everything I want, start on the case report, maybe read the articles for the journal club tomorrow and most importantly acquire all the TV series I did not watch in the last six months (or maybe I'll wait until the weekend, I might get pimped something new at the Querstrich meeting...)
Oh! I nearly forgot. I need to play around on Google Wave for a bit as well. Most of it sounds so cool, I've wanted to try it out for a few months already.

I'm feeling: indescribable

Hi, this is ridicully or Alex, who used to post here occasionally.

That is until work killed her dead and she made a deal with herself not to post any more until the first complete draft of the dissertation was out of her hands. I've been reading and - very occasionally - commenting on dreamwidth and intend to catch up on LJ as well. But, the point is...
I turned in the first draft. I don't have any control over when Prof. Blub will read it, but it's out of my hands. Dear gods but the words "Inaugural-Dissertation zur Erlangung des Grades eines Doktors der Veterinärmedizin" scare me to death.

Now, in an attempt to avoid freaking out completely, I'm going to have a bath, sleep for a few hours and enjoy the rest of the day (I worked the night shift today, hence the having the day off.)
Expect much babbling to happen around here for the next while.

Current Location: Leipzig
I'm feeling: mellow

At kriski's. dirtyzucchini's also here.

There was pimping of The Mentalist and Sherlock Holmes and I've been told there will be Leverage later on.
Also watched Star Trek and Iron Man, though I slept through the beginning of the later one.

Meeting fellow fans directly after the forth night-shift in ten days might not be the best thing for my sleep patterns, but it sure is fun.
Now back to trying to understand that Hunter-Gatherer extension for Carcassonne and later watch Wall-E and whatever else catches our fancy.

While I would love to squee at length about the movie - or even finally go to see it a second time - I can't. We have a prolapsed disc to operate on once I finished my tea, I'm on call for surgeries for the rest of the weekend and my parents are in town and will want to see me at some point today.

So, before my opinion gets influenced by the bits of flist-reading I'm hoping to do in between, I absolutely loved the movie. J.'s boything who went with me to watch it on Thursday was very amused to see me bouncing in my seat, clapping my hands and silently screaming at the most random moments.

I couldn't say if it's objectively a *good* movie - my judgement of everything Star Trek can't be trusted, because it's love, not rational - but I don't think it's a *bad* movie. And really, I'm not asking for more.
I don't really care for the Spock/Uhura shipping, but even that was handled mostly ok. And the rest just made me squee. (Any scene with Old!Spock, I was grinning like a loon).

And now, off to the world of CT-scans and myelograms.

I'm feeling: calm

I have one notebook updating to SP2 in my hall (originally here because Endnote tried to eat my colleague's dissertation), another notebook next to my desk, waiting for its data to be salvaged (its pretty dead otherwise) and a netbook that I'm supposed to set up with any OS that's not Linpus or Windows.
All this in addition to my own lot of computery things.

I thought I decided against IT when I went for veterinary medicine.

No wonder my diss is moving at glacial speed.

Crossposting to DW for now. I've not yet figured out for myself what I want to be my main account. Or how to handle the logistics.

I'm feeling: determined

Still around and reading. Just trying to finish the diss and as such a bit busy.
Once I hand it it, I expect babbling to happen.

Onward!

I'm feeling: weird

These Hochrechnungen are ... interesting.

All of the SPD's predicted losses more or less evenly distributed between Grüne and FDP? Sure, why not.

Having voted three weeks ago, I didn't pay much attention to the news in the last few weeks (that's about the only way I can cope with having to vote only one year after the last election, in addition to the other two elections this year) but that's certainly ... fascinating.

ETA: Difference SPD:FDP in my hometown? 1.9%
I did not expect that.

I'm feeling: hyper

Room dissasembled and mostly packed up, most presents bought, three quarters of the laundry done.

I've now taken my bed apart so many times, that I have favourite parts in doing it. Or least favourite parts.

The next move *will* be out of this country (it better be!) and as much as I like the bed, I'll be glad not to have to move the thing again.
(I only brained myself once this time! I can learn! But not that IKEA tells us it needs two people to put that thing together. That's just ridiculous.)

I'm feeling: awake

All right. It's Saturday, 9:45 am, and my plane leaves Monday at 12:15 pm.
In between now and then, I have to:

• Buy presents for my father, my uncle and about five friends
• Do the laundry (five loads, give or take)
• Move from my current flat to the new one

This, of course, is not only completely doable, but not at all stressful. At least that's what I tell myself.

In between I also should pack my bags for the week at the parents and figure out a way to get 26 GBP to London.
This might just prove to be the most complicated item on the to do list. I can pay the membership fee of the RCVS via credit card without any troubles, but paying this registration fee for a continuing education course can only be done via cheque (which no bank in Germany provides any more) or direct debit (which is only possible from the UK). I think I'll resort to just putting cash into an envelope and hoping they'll accept it.

Cleaning the eyes of a sedated fox at one in the morning (while not being on duty even) makes at least for good stories.

ETA: The mangy fox (and when I say mangy, I really mean *mangy*) at two I could have done without though

I'm feeling: relaxed

Why, reading five years worth of daily webcomics of course.

That and working/helping the night shift on four days in addition to the daily grind.
No, I no longer wonder why I'm behind on my flist, my diss and life in general.

But it's fun! I may need to stop doing it ever two months or so with a new comic though.

For some reason the radiators in the part of the clinic where the offices are located have broken down.
Of course this happens during what the media insists on calling a 'polar storm'.
It's kind of funny, really. Everybody has left the office and seeken refuge in some remote room of the clinic proper where temperatures may reach such tropical hights as 21*C

I'm feeling: weird
I'm listening to: Placebo - Every You Every Me | Powered by Last.fm

Amazingly enough, I'm not just thinking about writing an entry, no, I'm actually doing it. It's slightly worrying.

Because it's been a while, I think it's time again for my usual spiel: I am not a big commenter. I'm very OC about reading all the personal journals on my flist. I just never comment. It's just the way I do things. I'm not good with the whole social interaction thing so I only read. I doubt that's going to change any time soon. Just for everyone's information.

So, with this once again out of the way, what's new (or old as the case may be)?

• I caved and am now the sheepish owner of one iPhone. And it's much too fun a toy to be allowed.
• Like half of my flist I'm really happy with Merlin (It sneaks up on you! First it's only amusing and suddenly you're sqeeing without knowing why!)
• I've developed an obsession for underweight, pointy-faced guys and can't seem to shake it. Of course there are worse things to be obsessed about. But no obsession would be a nice thing too.
• I'm not talking about my dissertation. Talking, thinking, acknowledging...
• I've managed to get Prof. Bitch from more or less tolerating me to flat out *hating* me again. Understandable and worthwhile, but not very sensible.
• I'm probably moving next month. I hope. I've heard nothing since signing the contract but they said they'd be on holiday until December,...
• I've once again run into the problem of where to get references for applications. I'm aware that this will happen as long as I've not left that clinic, but leaving the clinic is kind of the point of sending out applications.
• I still like lists. Obviously.
• Saw the Rocky Horror Show yesterday. Riff Raff isn't supposed to have that hot a voice, I'm quite sure.
• The more I'm working on ignoring my diss, the less coherent I get (I know I've been saying that for years, but I feel it's really true). And I have to write quite a lot of essays in the next year to (hopefully) earn a CertAVP at some point. This doesn't bode well.
• I don't know what else to write, even though my head is full of stuff. I just can't make it make sense when put on paper.

Still alive, still pretty dead because of cold and second night shift in three days, still endlessly behind diss (don't ask about flist).
STOP
Behind on thanks for birthday wishes (am very grateful if slightly overwhelmed) as well as wishing happy birthdays to others (mea culpa kriski :( )
STOP
Cautiously happy about results of USian election even though wary of charismatic politicians.
STOP
Emphatically not happy about having to vote in state elections in addition to federal elections next year (thanks a lot Ms Ypsilanti).
STOP
Waiting for new Merlin and very close to buying an iPhone (The /-Meeting connection)
STOP
Beyond coherent thought, off to read now.

Working the night shift on the night the clocks are turned back really sucks.

On the other hand, now I have new Merlin waiting for me.

Life is full of unexpected bonuses.

I'm feeling: accomplished

Am somewhere in the vicinity of Frankfurt. Had the car serviced, met with one insurance drone, will meet with the second at 5. After that? I'm off to Mainz and the anual slasher-meeting.

At some point I'll write down my thoughts on my arsehole of a landlord, whom I can than for the nice task of having to find a flat in Berlin *again*.

I'm feeling: barely awake

No work tomorrow. Maybe I'll have something else but the clinic to photograph then.

Current Location: Berlin, Germany
I'm feeling: sleepy

Since I'm at work right now, I didn't get a chance to upload my WITL photos in time. Won't, until I get home sometime around noon today either, so instead I give you a photo of myself right now:

I'm at work, it's the middle of the night and my shift doesn't end for another 6,5 hours. I wouldn't have cared about my looks even if the instructions hadn't forbidden it.

I'm feeling: determined

Since this journal has been lacking content lately, I've decided to try to revive it with a meme. (Or maybe I just like running around with a camera)
As last seen on fyrie's journal, the 7 day photomeme.

I'm feeling: frustrated

• Your dog doesn't belong on a golf course
• If your dog is jumping around and wagging its tail, 3 a.m. is not the time to visit the vet because of a cough
• Close the door to your budgie's cage before playing with your Wii
• If the clinic's door is closed at 3:30 a.m. *read the signs* and ring the bell, don't walk around the building, rattling every door, looking if one has been left open, giving the personnel coronaries.
• If there are any doubts about your dogs complete obedience and cars are around *put it on a leash*.
• Cats will try to jump out of open windows at some point. Being able to land on their feet might only mean that those fracture fist.

This list brought to you by one very frustrating week of work.

(Oh, and I found a better way to archieve my twitterings, so no more cluttering up the page with these for now.)

I'm feeling: tired

I only realize how finely tuned my online reading habits are when I loose about a week completely due to computers deciding to die. Now, after I've forsaken Windows and figured out how to do most of what I want and need to do on Linux, I'm stuck with a backlog of 800 flist posts, about 250 articles in my feeds and about five How-Tos to work out the remaining problems.
Of course this would be the moment for me to start on another fantasy trilogy of about a thousand pages.

I'm feeling: grumbly

Good Prof. Blub decided to forget that he explicitly asked me to stay at the clinic to cover anything anaesthesia. Apparently even the fact that one week later he tried to convince me to try for an alternate residency, because I said I didn't want to stay too long because I want to do a residency at some point, slipped his mind.
I told him I thought it was logistically impossible for me to only do anaesthesia, but he didn't beleive me when I told him. And now? He'd probably claim to not remember that as well.
And of course he doesn't remember telling me that he'll somehow pay me. Why would he?

So, what did he say yesterday? Oh, after his question if I intended to stay longer his first question was how I was going to pay for my living. Of course I couldn't answer that because it wasn't exactly the question I was expecting. Which gave him the opportunity to generously offer to pay me via one of the stipends he's promised us for over a year now. For that he wants me to go back on the generally duty roster.

Did I say "Hell no!"? No I didn't because I can't speak up for myself in situations like this.
One of these days I'l learn to stand up for myself and not just for others. This is really a very annoying character trait.
But at least my frank answer why I work only one type of emergency shifts and not all of them, ("Because Prof. Bitch doesn't want me to") resulted in an argument between the both of them and now I'm allowed to work them all.

No matter, since I really don't want to go back on the rotation system (not because I don't like it, but because it would give Prof. Bitch too much of a hold on me), I'm just going to ignore that he told me I should have myself put back on the roster. That's the advantage of working in such an unorganized place.
I'm just going to do my thing, come in every day and see how long this works. I think it might work for a pretty long time, as long as I'm seen working (and he hasn't told the Bitch about that plan).

I'm looking forward on how much Prof. Blub won't like my "Oh, did I say I was going to stay? Must have forgotten that." once I find a better place to work.
Of course this is kind of dependent on actually finding a place that will take me on and finishing the diss so he doesn't have that much control over me any more, but I'll worry about that when I come to it.

Unrelated: I cut my hair. Or rather, I tried to and it turned out just slightly too short. Oh well, I'll live and it will grow back again.

I'm feeling: curious

I just spend about an hour at the bookshop. And didn't buy any books.
Keep in mind that I was the girl that went to the library about twice a week and was an expert at the 'arms as long as possible and use your chin to fix the top' method of carrying books.
Maybe that's the explanation, there were quite a lot of that I wouldn't have minded to read, but I didn't want to buy them.
I'm not sure if I'm getting even more stingy with money or shelf space.
I think I need to have a look at the libraries in Berlin. Hopefully they'll suit me better than the one in Leipzig which I hated for no real reason.